WHEN SHARON LONDON DIED - A LINK TO A GENERATION THAT'S GONE

It seems easier to describe someone when you hear what someone else says about them. A quote about our Cousin Sharon, written by her patient, is spot on.

As Robin Quivers, shock jock Howard Stern’s sidekick, wrote in her acclaimed 1993 book Quivers, A Life, which she dedicated in part to our beloved cousin, Sharon London Person, her Park Avenue psychologist educated at Brooklyn College, having received her Ph.D. at the City University of New York, “This Book Is Dedicated To: My mother and father for giving me life. Dr. Sharon London for teaching me how to live it. And My uncle Leroy for simply loving me.”

Within the informative pages of The New York Times best-seller, Quivers espoused, “When I finally stepped into Dr. London’s office I met a large, round woman whose kind face was framed in red curls that tumbled to her shoulders…I returned my attention to Dr. London as she lit a cigarette and began her interrogation….Dr. London refrained from speaking until I had completed my entire spiel. After I’d finished, she looked at me with a twinkle in her eye and said, ‘Well, we have our work cut out for us, don’t we?’ Then she dived right in….Remember, this was 1983. …Her services came at a very high price for that era…but I was impressed with the woman’s self-confidence…….I promised myself I’d work hard. At Dr. London’s prices, I knew that was a promise I was more likely to keep.”

All I can respond with is, “Boy, was that ever Sharon.” Robin only failed to mention that Sharon spoke with a charming Brooklynese.

Edythe, Sharon’s mother, was my mother-in-law's sister. Sharon Donna, or in Hebrew, Scheina Dina (named after her maternal grandmother, my husband’s grandmother, Jennie Bloom Pollack, listed on immigration records as Scheine D. Genachausky), grew up in Brooklyn. A short distance across the river, her family was a mainstay with the family in New Jersey.

The family on Sharon’s paternal side owned a home in the Catskills, and my husband enjoyed family time there in his youth, where he especially recalled the open fields. Sharon fondly recollected working as part of the summer staff at a local hotel there in her teenage years, during the heyday of the Jewish resorts.

Not too long after her beloved father’s premature death at age 49, her mother met a Holocaust survivor while traveling on the subway to work. Previously a bachelor, Bill told us of his escape through the kitchen window of his childhood home in Belgium as the Nazis approached, never to see his mother again. He and Edythe married in 1967 in Brooklyn and eventually relocated to Florida, where we visited them.

When Sharon married “Lex” (Alexander Person) in 1977, we attended their wedding…it was Lex’s second marriage, and his daughter sang a love song to the newly married couple. Sharon considered Lex's two daughters and their children as her children and grandchildren. Lex’s late-to-be-discovered love child, his third daughter, and her precocious daughter were equally accepted and cherished by Sharon.

From cousin’s club get-togethers at her upscale Chelsea neighborhood apartment in New York City (NYC) to family parties at their lake house and sleepovers, those smoke-filled rooms were always full of laughter, drinks from a well-stocked bar, and good food. At one of the bustling family reunions, the phone rang, and with laughter, you could hear Lex quip, “Sharon said to take Compoz and call her in the morning.”

Speaking of their house abutting a lake in the Poconos, with any mention of our June 15, 1975 wedding, Sharon fondly recalled that as the day she and Lex purchased their country house on Stillwater Drive in Pocono Summit. On our ride home from a fun party at the lake, the fog was as thick as pea soup; I still find it a miracle that we safely made our way out from the winding dirt roads to the highway.

Sharon and Lex visited us and came to all our celebrations, leaving us with the fondest memories. After a five-year courtship, their 18-year marriage dissolved. Every year after their subsequent divorce, until she became too disabled to travel, Sharon was a regular guest at all our holiday dinners, from Thanksgiving to Hanukkah, Passover, and every party in between.

While they were together, Sharon and Lex loved to travel, and Sharon sparked the idea of exchanging exciting places to visit and appealing eateries to try. Speaking of food, I can picture the devilish smile on her face when she and Lex brought a cheesecake for the four of us. Sharon was also into fashion, even donning a paper dress.

A self-made woman, as a renowned psychologist with a Park Avenue New York office, Sharon would occasionally hand out free advice. Over many years, with my parents and in-laws in attendance, she sat watching my role as daughter/mother, secretly analyzing me along the way.

One of the last years that our parents were all well enough to join us, Sharon’s only sibling, her younger brother Richard, surprised us with a visit from California and came to our Thanksgiving table in 1996 to see his aunt, uncle, and cousins whom he remembered so fondly from his childhood.

Asking our adult children what they were thankful for on Thanksgiving, Sharon bemoaned that throughout the years, she abused her body by overeating and smoking. After she could no longer drive and the train became too difficult, she opted for an expensive car service across the state line for the familiarity and comfort of being with family. A great fan of my cooking and baking, she always took home the turkey carcass to make into soup, plus many other goodies from the dinner and dessert leftovers.

When she became too disabled to join us, we delivered the leftovers to her in NYC. All our friends and relatives knew and enjoyed the company of Cousin Sharon.

After she was steadily using a wheelchair and oxygen, I went to the city to escort Sharon to the High Line, a favorite destination of my husband and mine, which she wanted to experience based on my hype. We were her guests at the theater and dinners, joined by her brother Richard and his wife Toby when they were in town.

Whether visiting with Richard and Toby in San Francisco, meeting at Pier 39 to watch the sea lions, or going to one of Richard’s favorite finds, such as the Jack London statue in Oakland, it was always fun to be with our cousins. We treasure the memory of Toby, who had been a restaurant hostess, holding our baby so that we could eat peacefully and sharing delicious group hugs before we parted.

When Toby passed away unexpectedly in 2022, her sister Suzi arranged a memorial service. My husband and I represented the family and were able to see Richard one last time before attending his service prepared by Suzi in 2023.

When the rabbi asked if anyone wanted to speak, my husband revealed memories of his cousin Richard as “a cool cat,” always with a cigarette dangling. With a quick scan of those gathered, it was easy to see that Suzi and her family wholeheartedly agreed with his picture-perfect characterization of Richard.

As told about Grandaunt Esther Schneider in Let’s Discuss Esther Schneider, at sharonmarkcohen.com, dated March 5, 2024, this ends the run for the family of Sharon’s mother, my mother-in-law’s sister Edythe, as Sharon and Richard’s wife Toby bore no offspring. That means it’s up to us to keep their memories alive.

Since Sharon and I often spoke between visits, numerous thoughts come to mind. I dread to think that so much about Sharon is unknown or will be forgotten. She spoke lovingly about her dearest childhood friend Deeny Riback, for example, and I was able to send Sharon advertisements for the local children’s camp, which Deeny’s family was instrumental in starting, Camp Deeny Riback - JCC Metrowest.

Sharon accepted an invitation to celebrate the bar mitzvah of her late friend Deeny’s grandson on March 17, 2001, the same day as our eldest son’s bar mitzvah. After much contemplation, she attended the other child’s service and our son’s party. When self-planning her 50th birthday celebration, with a date during Passover, she made sure to set a box of matzah on the table for us. The invitation came on cheerful yellow paper.

Always open to trying new things, she even tried a new name for a short while, when she went by the name Sherry. With an avid interest in the stock market, she also published her original poetry works. While dealing with several health issues, including some vision loss due to wet macular degeneration, she worked hard to stay positive and continue with her activities. The aging of her mind and body could not mask her youthful exuberance and will to live.

Here, I offer commentary from our son Moss:

“As my mother said, Sharon was always a warm and welcome addition to our family holidays and parties. She had the most gentle voice and way of speaking, and could talk with you about most anything. I’ll always remember her going outside for a smoke break - meticulously taking her oxygen tank with her and removing the nose piece between puffs - a true pro! When I told her once about a school musical that I was performing in and shared some very basic theatrical practices (basic or advanced - she was incredibly well-versed in theater) that we would employ as if I was the first person who had ever come to understand them, she didn’t talk down to me but happily nodded along and asked ever-more engaging questions.

“One of my earlier memories is visiting her lake home in the Poconos as a small child and wandering into the water, feet sticking ever deeper into the mud with each step. Whether in our home in New Jersey, Sharon’s in the Poconos or in Chelsea, it was always lovely to spend time with her and I’ll cherish those memories fondly.”

Our daughter Rina added: “I always admired Sharon’s warmth. I have great memories of being at her lake house in the Poconos. It was fun to have her with my parents and Uncle Bryan all together on Thanksgiving and Passover.”

Judd, our eldest, also saddened by Cousin Sharon’s passing, holds memories of her in happier times close to his heart.

We will all forever hold dear our fondest memories of Sharon with her ingratiating laughter and charm and remain grateful for her presence. May she rest in eternal peace alongside her parents, Edythe and Harry, her step-father Bill Bander, her brother Richard, and his wife Toby, who she considered a beloved sister.

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Sharon Donna London Person, PhD

April 22, 1939 Brooklyn, NY

February 20, 2024 New York, NY

Toby Pollack London - Richard Alan London

May 23, 1944 Brooklyn, NY - January 27, 1943 Brooklyn, NY

December 5, 2022 Venice, FL - June 30, 2023 Suffern, NY

May Their Memories Be A Blessing

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Unfortunately, my husband and I were out of town when Sharon, who was always full of laughter and love, passed away. Rick, her power of attorney and a close friend for 20 years, left us a message to call him. It took us a week to connect with him as he and his wife were on a cruise. Sadly, it was then that we learned that Sharon had passed away in her apartment on West 83rd Street in NYC.

To date, there are no services planned for her. Rick informed us that Sharon had been receiving care at her home for the past nine years, with his sister Teri being her main attendant. We are grateful for their dedicated time and care for our dear Cousin Sharon. May they be blessed for their kindness.

Their wedding was announced in The New York Times, 7/4/1977

“Dr. Sharon London is Bride

“Dr. Sharon Donna London, daughter of Mrs. William Bander of Flushing, Queens, and the late Harry Morris London of Brooklyn, was married in Brooklyn yesterday to Alexander Dunbar Person, son of Mr. and Mrs. Bernard Person of New York. Rabbi Fredric S. Dworkin performed the ceremony at the Deauville. The bride is a psychologist. Her husband is president of Aladdin Associates Inc., a publishing and printing concern in the Bronx. His previous marriage ended in divorce.”

Our autographed copy of *Quivers: A Life*

Sharon London through the years - note in one photo she signed “Love, Sherry”

Sharon seated at the head of our kitchen table for Chanukkah 12-4-99 Moss Cohen facing camera, my brother Stu with beard and cousin Flora seated next to Moss - Arnee Cohen by the sink

Arnee Cohen and his brother Bryan with their cousin Sharon in our backyard in South Orange, NJ 2009

From my family newsletter: Thanksgiving 2014 Sharon and Arnee Cohen at our South Orange home with Sharon London Person and our son Judd
No pictures were taken when Sharon and other cousins joined us for Passover 2014
The newsletter to that side of our family only noted the relatives from that side who were at our home (others from my side were not noted)

Sharon London Person and Arnee Cohen February 27, 2015 NYC after seeing a comedy by Larry David - Fish In The Dark

Sharon Mark Cohen and Sharon London Person

Sharon London Person enjoying time on the High Line September 5, 2015 We had a really nice day. Hard to believe it was about a decade ago!

Edythe Pollack at her wedding to Harry London June 22. 1935 Brooklyn, NY

Edythe and her second husband, Holocaust Survivor, Bill Bander undated

Top - Bill Bander after WWII, next photo down, Aunt Edythe and Uncle Bill, next, Arnee and Sharon Cohen with Edythe and Bill at the Pocono Lake House of Sharon London and Lex Person

Rina snapped this photo in Florida when we visited Uncle Bill with our children in November 1999, five years after Aunt Edythe’s passing

“Cool Cat” Richard London at my wedding on June 15, 1975

Arnee Cohen and his cousin Richard London with Moss Cohen in the stroller, watching the sea lions at Pier 39 in San Francisco 1996

Rina Cohen and Toby London at Pier 39 San Francisco 1996

December 24, 2003 in San Francisco Sharon, Arnee, Judd, Rina, and Moss Cohen with cousins Toby and Richard London

September 2014 Richard London and his cousin, Arnee Cohen at Sharon London Person’s home in the Poconos

September 2014 Toby Pollack London *no relation to her mother-in-law’s Pollack family and Sharon Mark Cohen at Sharon London Person’s home in the Poconos

Additional photos below were added June 25, 2024 when received from Nancy Person