STILL MAKING CONNECTIONS
Emailing with Cousin Ellen led to a special moment. Her maternal cousin Steve worked at the Institute for Advanced Study (IAS) in Princeton. Ellen, a part-time dance instructor, says that he is multi-talented, as she has danced with him at several family functions, adding that he is a really good dancer. With that, she chimed in, just like Jeff. Her father and Jeff’s were cousins.
Not long after I first became acquainted with Ellen, which was in response to my family tree research, she came east from California, and we met in New York City. Now, we are not just cousins, but close friends. She even gave my manuscript, Kitchen Talk, a first-read and offered very professional advice, adding that she sees it as a movie or tv series.
Ellen remembered family events and picnics with my in-laws when she was younger, before I came on the scene in 1969. One of Ellen’s strongest memories from her youth is the exhilaration of dancing with my husband’s older brother Jeffrey, of blessed memory, at a family celebration.
Arnee, with a vivid memory of the original scene, agreed that there was a film shot of Ellen and his brother, Jeffrey, swing dancing at a cousin’s Bar Mitzvah party. He has seen the famous home movie and was intrigued that she was the mystery girl on the screen dancing the night away with Jeffrey. Wouldn’t that be a great scene when my book gets converted to film?
Fast forward about 20 years since the time we met in New York, to a recent correspondence after I tackled some genealogy research on her mother’s family. When I asked about her cousin Steven on her maternal side of her family, Ellen talked about his brilliance and also dancing with him, as she once again recalled the ease of dancing with Jeffrey.
She went on to tell me her cousin Steve lived in New Jersey because he worked at the prestigious IAS in Princeton. To her surprise, I informed her that Jeffrey had worked there for a period around 1970. I remembered visiting him there with Arnee. I suggested that she ask her cousin Steve if he, by chance, knew Jeff.
The following morning, I woke up to email correspondence from Ellen and Steve. Ellen wrote to Steve: “Jeff is actually a late cousin, since he passed away several years ago, but left an interesting legacy. Moreover, Jeff, like you, was a good dancer and years ago at a Bar Mitzvah in New Jersey I was fortunate enough to dance swing with [him]. Somewhere there's a photo of that lucky event, but none of us can find it. I do also remember dancing the rumba with you at our multi-class reunion (58-59) but it's just a memory, for we have no photos of that event either.”
Steve’s reply included, “I looked him up, he was at IAS 69 to 71, so 50 years ago. I have a mental image, but couldn't find a photo of him online to see if it is right. He was doing research on general relativity--black holes, etc. Maybe Sharon has a photo of Jeff she could email.”
With that, I sent several pieces of memorabilia and photos to Steve and Ellen. His welcome response was, “Many thanks for the information and photos of Jeffrey. My mental image does correspond to what you sent. Very sad that he died so young from MS.” As for Ellen, she insists, “Very nice photos and information. Still wish we had the swing photo to go along with the inertia study!”
Jeffrey (1940-2003) would have approved.
